Okay. So AJ showed me this super awesome cartoon called "Dinosaur Cartoons", which just features two dinosaurs having adult conversations. Simple enough. The link to the actual site is right here:

http://www.qwantz.com/

So recently, I found a customized window for Adium (my AIM chat client), and it makes my chat window look like the two dinosaurs from the comic, so when you talk, it looks like the dinos are actually having a conversation.

I've been thinking that this is the funniest thing ever, and as a result, I've started taking screen shots of select conversations that make interesting little comics. For the record, I'm the green t-rex on the left, and whoever I am talking to (various people on my buddy list) are the orange utahraptor on the right. Enjoy the first installation!


Dorks






Self Discovery









More to come!!

Okay, so maybe i titled the subject heading a little out of order. Cause MAN do I want to write about stupid people. How do they exist? Or better yet, how is it that there are people in the same working situation I am in, but older, with (supposedly) more experience than me, and still stupid?

Maybe its the fact that its St. Patty's day, and my tongue is feeling a little loosened, but regardless, I am starting to get pretty fed up with not only the idiots that work at my bush-league (yeah, you read that right) company, but just with the general populous in general.

For example. There is a person at work, and they saw that movie "Zeitgeist," and is totally on board with everything that it entails. For those of you that don't know what the Zeitgeist is, is basically a retarded movie that discusses this massive conspiracy involving the major rulers of the world conspiring to ultimately seize control of the entire human race, manipulating them through wars, and economic crises. Anyone who opposes this conspiracy is removed from the picture. (See: JFK.) Apparently, the story is now Obama has signed on with these conspirators in bringing about a "New World Order" where we are all willing slaves to civilization. I don't even want to waste this post de-bunking this. All I'm going to say is: it's retarded. And if you think that Zeitgeist is legit, or any of the other stuff I have said so far is true, then get on youtube, watch a video about the 9/11 "conspiracy" called LOOSE CHANGE, and then go play in traffic.

SPEAKING OF playing in traffic, I saw a video of a bunch of drag queens playing in traffic on some freeway not two days ago. Stepping in front of cars, rubbing their disgusting drag-queen bodies against the windows of the cars, exposing the poor occupants inside to images they probably never in their life wanted to see. Long story shot, one drag queen gets hit by a bus. Like in the movies. One second he's dancing there in front of the camera - the next second, BUS. I laughed at what I saw, and when i was berated for laughing, I just shook my head, and pointed out that that was simply Darwinism at work, and the phrase "why don't you go play in traffic" was never supposed to be taken literally. Actually playing in traffic. Morons. Upon reflection, I will go as far to say that people definitely do NOT "deserve" to die - because who is Man to be able to judge who lives and who dies? But some people definitely "have it coming."

So I guess here is a question: When it comes to stupidity and mortality, where does one draw the line? How is it I get chastised for laughing at someone who is dumb enough get themselves hit by a bus for dancing in traffic, but then i turn around, and there are whole television franchises based on people getting kicked in the nuts, or hit in the face by a baseball-bat-wielding toddler, or people trying to do skateboarding tricks and breaking almost every bone in their body in the process? Do you draw the line at mortality? I mean, is it funny until the subject does something dumb enough to finally shove himself off the mortal coil, and then its "too bad"?

Douglas Adams once wrote, "Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so."

I feel like that pretty much sums it up in a nutshell. Bottom line, if you get killed doing something stupid, then you're an idiot, and mother nature is trying to send humankind one of the most blatant, easy to understand messages ever. SO LISTEN.

The existence and success of work like the Darwin Awards makes me feel just a bit more vindicated. To be honest, I think if people died being an idiot, they need to be called out. If I died for something stupid, I would expect someone from my family to get up to the podium, and say something to the effect of "Drew was a great guy, but he was a ##$*@( IDIOT for deciding to (insert stupid action here). I loved the guy, but the moron had it coming. I hope we can all learn something from him."

I could go on and on about the stupidity of the people that work here, but it would take way too much time, and everyone would probably think a lot less of me.

After getting an AWESOME birthday card via email the other day, I was reminded of a past love.  That's right, kids.  HIPPO.

Now that I finally live in Tinsel Town, as it was put, I think it's time to start bringing this beautiful work of art to life.  ETA till theatrical release?  Unknown.  Could be years....  BUT, we have the working title:

Now granted, I know its not THE hippo, and the image is watermarked, but it was the best I could do on short notice.  Plus I'm at work, and have wasted WAY too much time on this already.

Oh yeah. I went there. check out this clip from "The Onion." Now I know mac users are REALLY ignorant, so before you think this is a real article, "The Onion" is a satirical newspaper. To put it in Mac terms, "It's a funny story that isn't real." And the best part? Mac users think this is funny. That's right, kids, the educated population of the US isn't laughing AT you, they're laughing WITH you. Whatever helps you sleep at night. Enjoy!

Yeah.  Way to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory.  And way to be all chummy moments before Texas stuffed it in your face.  Oh yeah.  And way to represent the Big Ten. 

You know what they say:  If you want something done poorly, get someone from Ohio State to do it.  Or maybe its just me that says it.  Regardless, it's true.

I know.

Just shut up.

• A guy in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, “Wanna hear a Buckeye joke?” The guy replies, “Well, before you tell that joke, you should know something. I am 6′ tall, 200 lbs. and I am an Ohio State graduate. The guy sitting next to me is 6′2″, 225 lbs., and he is an Ohio State graduate. The guy right next to him is 6′5″, 250lbs., and he is also an Ohio State graduate. Now, you still wanna tell me that joke?” The first guy says, “No, not if I’m going to have to explain it three times.”
• It was reported that the Ohio Football Coach Jim Tressel will only be dressing 40 players for the Michigan game …the rest of the players will have to dress them selves.
• Did you hear that the Ohio State University library burned to the ground? All five books in the library were completely destroyed and the football team is really upset by the fire; they hadn’t colored in two of the books yet.
• Q: What does the average Ohio State University student get on his SAT? A: Drool.
• Q: How do you get an Ohio State Graduate off your front porch? A: Pay him for the pizza.
• Q: What did the OSU grad say to the Michigan grad? A: “Welcome to McDonald’s. May I take your order please?”
• Q: Why is ice no longer available at Ohio State football games? A: Because the senior who knew the recipe finally graduated.
• A young man hired by a supermarket reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, “Your first job will be to sweep the store.” But, I’m a OSU graduate,” the young man replied indignantly, “I even played football there!” “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know that,” said the manager. “Here, give me the broom, I better show you how”.
• Two Ohio State football players were hootin’ and hollerin’ while partying on campus when a bartender asked them why they were celebrating. The smart one said proudly that they had just finished a jigsaw puzzle and it only took them two months. “Two months?!” exclaimed the bartender. The Buckeye proudly replied, “Yeah, the box said 4 - 6 years!”
• A Buckeye football player was almost killed today in a tragic horse back riding accident. He fell from the horse and was nearly trampled to death. Luckily, the manager of the Wal-Mart came out and unplugged the horse.
• A little boy and his mother were walking through an Ohio cemetery when they came upon a headstone that read: “Here lies an OSU graduate and a good man.” The little boy asked his mother, “Mommy, why did they bury two people in there?”
• Coaches Jim Tressel and Lloyd Carr are walking down the beach talking about the rivalry between Ohio State and Michigan. As they are walking, Lloyd trips over something in the sand. Upon closer inspection it turns out to be a genie’s lamp. “Who disturbs me?” asked the genie. Jim and Lloyd both say they did. “You will each get one wish,” said the genie. Jim offers to go first. “I want an impenetrable wall built around the entire state of Ohio so that none of those stupid Michiganders can ever get in. I want it as far down into the ground as it is high and I want it to be completely sealed in so that we can finally have our peace!” The genie grants the wish to Jim and his is instantly whisked away to his new paradise. The genie now tells Lloyd he’ll grant him one wish. Lloyd says, “Fill it with water.”
• How many Ohio State Fans does it take to change a lightbulb?      Only one, but he gets 3 credits and $1,000 for it.
• Four college Alumni were climbing a mountain one day: An OSU grad, a Michigan grad, a Penn State grad, and a Notre Dame grad. Each proclaimed to be the most loyal fan of their alma mater. As they climbed higher, they argued as to which of them was the most loyal of all. They continued to argue all the way to the top when the Notre Dame grad hurled him self off the mountainside shouting "This is for the fighting Irish!" Not wanting to be outdone, the Penn State grad threw him self off the mountain proclaiming, "This is for the Nittany Lions!" Seeing this, the Michigan grad walked over and shouted, "This is for the Wolverines!" and pushed the Ohio State grad off the mountain
• What's the only sign of intelligent life in Columbus?      "Ann Arbor: 187 Miles"

GO BLUE!  I have a sneaking suspicion this game could be a little better than people are thinking....

I got one today! 

I'm so proud.  People waste so much energy hating on other people who don't care, me included. 

Seeing people get worked up over something so insignificant that is has no effect on their life at all is, well, a little bit funny.  I mean, if people get worked up because someone they've never met, will never meet and will never see again says or does or posts or whatevers something they don't agree with - then i want to see how that person deals with a REAL situation.

Man!  Do I smel psych test?






Smells good.